Sorry for not blogging for a while I’ve recently taken on my NVQ 3 in the Early Years so juggling this, back to school with the start of GCSEs for one ALevels for another and Year 1 and me back to lots of gorgeous 2 year olds at preschool my heads spinning ! But we have managed to do our first camping trip this weekend so i will include some piccies.
Back to the Girls
I had forgotten to mention on my last blog post how the girls had been involved and the assessments we had to go through with them.
After we had done our life story our social worker J asked to speak to the girls together without us being present, quite unnerving for us but understandable, and as J was so lovely we felt we had nothing to worry about. The girls were happy to do this as they had got to know her during our visits. This only took about 20 minutes and all three of them came out laughing so next it was on to the observation. We were asked to choose an activity we all enjoyed and could be observed doing together, we chose baking as its something the girls love.
It was a Saturday morning and we had everything set up J came and she just sat and watched us interact as a family, for some reason i felt really nervous it felt as though i was being investigated on whether i was a good mum ! it all went well just got a bit messy while mixing multicoloured icing but the cakes all rose so it was all good ! We then had a cuppa and of course a cup cake, we were told it was all good and she liked the way the girls had such a good, open and fun relationship with their step dad. She left and maybe the pressure maybe my insecurities coming out i had a little cry, in all the years of being mum i had never been observed being one and not being the most confident person in this world it caused me to have a little wobble.
After panel we then looked into finding some couples that had adopted with birth children to go and visit, one really lovely couple i had met through the school i worked in and had kept updated on our process invited us to go and spend the afternoon with them. They were foster carers themselves and had recently adopted a little girl. We went to visit them on a Sunday afternoon and i brought cake, we chatted about how there adoption had gone and what it had been like for the other family members, they had both been foster carers for years had and looked after many vulnerable children. They were brilliant, such a lovely couple and a true inspiration.
We were then given another family to visit that had adopted two boys and had two birth daughters, they were lovely and had the most gorgeous dog, we went on an evening when the boys were in bed and got to speak the girls who were both lovely, they explained that at first they had been quite nervous about having new little brothers, when they arrived they were quite unsettled and times had been quite difficult. Even though things had not been easy you could just see that years down the line the love the girls and mum and dad had for their boys and how the whole process had been a positive experience and they were now a very happy family.
Finally we went to visit a gay couple that had adopted two brothers, before being adopted they had been in separate foster homes so when they moved in it was the first time they had met. For them the settling in period had been quite stressful and demanding also it was a huge adjustment as neither of them had had children. They had been given extra support from social services and things had now settled down.
What was so lovely about all of these families was that even though they had all faced big challenges you could just see the unconditional love they had for all of there adopted children.