Little A’s Full profile

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About a week later we had a visit from J and she gave us A’s full profile.  She explained what would be inside and the amount of detail it would go into and the fact that we may find it quite upsetting but should read it all and see if we were still happy to progress and then get back to her if we had any questions that needed answering .

It was quite daunting as it was a 30 page document and a lot of reading to do, we were both feeing nervous about starting it as we were scared about what it would say.

Its been a while since I’ve read this so while writing this I’m reading it at the same time even now its a very difficult thing to read, reading it now after 2 years just brings it home again how special he is.

It starts from A’s birth and gives in great detail the first 3 years of his life before he was taken into care, it describes when it was first reported that friends were concerned for his well being, to every visit sometimes daily to the home, and the strategies put in place to try and help birth mother and father to improve the home environment and care for the children.  We also found out that he had 3 birth brothers and sisters.  All the simple things that we take for granted, a clean bed, a bath, clean clothes, a healthy diet or just simply nutritional food to eat and a safe home environment, none of which he or his siblings had.

Being taken in to care eventually at 3 years old which was best for him, i can’t imagine how traumatic it was for his older brothers and sisters who were aware of what was going on must just of been horrible.  Luckily for them they were sent to live with the most lovely foster carers (separately A was with one family and the other 3 in a different foster home together) who do the most incredible job. I take my hat off to them, they have all this love to give and look after them sometimes for a year or longer and then have to say goodbye when they are actually officially adopted.

Emotional as it was nothing written in that report put us off or stopped us wanting to go ahead with the matching process so we contacted the social worker and she arranged for us to have a home visit from A’s social worker.

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11th October The Matching Process

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Autumn here we come ! i am loving the dark evenings and cosy fires and candles and of course the winter wardrobe ! Not too sure about these dark mornings though.  Had a fabulous Sunday,  after collecting Emma Bridgewater for 15 years i finally got to meet her at the Cheltenham Lit Fest and she was lovely and inspiring, i even got my book signed.

Now on to the exiting yet daunting bit !

We were given a lot of advice about what it would be like to look at children’s profiles and how difficult it would be to actually turn one down as all these lovely children need a home.  But we were also told that we would know when it was the right one.

i remember getting a call from the lovely J to say she had 3 profiles for us, at time she lived just by where i worked so i left work with butterflies and picked them up turning them upside down so i couldn’t see the pictures.  Sadly Matthew was away that night so we decided to open them together on FaceTime as we were too excited to leave it until the next day !

We were given 3, a 2 year old girl, an 18 month old boy and a soon to be 3 year old boy.  We opened the soon to be 3 year old first and the date of birth just hit us as he was going to be 3 in two days time ! I think this pulled at our heart strings, we read his profile and saw his pictures and just both seemed to get a connection.  We then looked at the other two profiles and felt sad and guilty for them but even though they were younger we couldn’t help feel that the first one was right for us.

We decided to  contact J then next day and ask if we could see his full information as we wanted to go ahead.  Just to explain initially you are only given a sheet with picture and a little background information of each child, once deciding to go ahead you then get to look as his full case and background information.

We were both really excited with the possibility that we had just seen a picture of our new son.

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