About a week later we had a visit from J and she gave us A’s full profile. She explained what would be inside and the amount of detail it would go into and the fact that we may find it quite upsetting but should read it all and see if we were still happy to progress and then get back to her if we had any questions that needed answering .
It was quite daunting as it was a 30 page document and a lot of reading to do, we were both feeing nervous about starting it as we were scared about what it would say.
Its been a while since I’ve read this so while writing this I’m reading it at the same time even now its a very difficult thing to read, reading it now after 2 years just brings it home again how special he is.
It starts from A’s birth and gives in great detail the first 3 years of his life before he was taken into care, it describes when it was first reported that friends were concerned for his well being, to every visit sometimes daily to the home, and the strategies put in place to try and help birth mother and father to improve the home environment and care for the children. We also found out that he had 3 birth brothers and sisters. All the simple things that we take for granted, a clean bed, a bath, clean clothes, a healthy diet or just simply nutritional food to eat and a safe home environment, none of which he or his siblings had.
Being taken in to care eventually at 3 years old which was best for him, i can’t imagine how traumatic it was for his older brothers and sisters who were aware of what was going on must just of been horrible. Luckily for them they were sent to live with the most lovely foster carers (separately A was with one family and the other 3 in a different foster home together) who do the most incredible job. I take my hat off to them, they have all this love to give and look after them sometimes for a year or longer and then have to say goodbye when they are actually officially adopted.
Emotional as it was nothing written in that report put us off or stopped us wanting to go ahead with the matching process so we contacted the social worker and she arranged for us to have a home visit from A’s social worker.