Another 2 months have flown by since I’ve written on here ! Well thankfully we’re now near the end of a dreary January which has been a bit grey this last week, surprisingly for me in January 2017 I’ve been feeling at my most positive mentally than i have been in a long time so long may it last. Soon to be February which i love as i have a birthday, anniversary and of course Valentines day !
So the next part of the process was preparing with A’s social worker our case for matching Panel in the hope that they would approve us and the adoption would go ahead.
If you remember i said that we didn’t get off to a very good start with A’s social worker, funnily enough he left before our next meet up ! So we were then introduced to the very lovely L who we hit it off with straight away, she was lovely and told us that they had found no reason why we wouldn’t be suitable to adopt A so matching panel preparation started.
This process involved the social worker building a case of why she thought we were suitable adopters, again this meant more visits with us and my birth daughters, and other lead professionals that had been involved with A over the last year.
We were then given a more in depth medical reports to read, just to explain a bit more about this when children are taken into care due to neglect then are then subject to full medical assessment to check if any of their development has been affected by the years of neglect. After we had read this we then had to go to meet with the adoption medical professional. Although we were excited we were a little nervous in case there was anything brought up to worry about, as this was only a few days before the matching panel date we were anxious.
We met Dr S at the hospital she came across as quite cold and professional, we were then given her opinion of what she thought of A and his development and any concerns she thought he may have in the future. It started off ok his progress had come on quite well since he had been in foster care, there were still worries about his speech and the affects of alcohol during pregnancy on his later development.
She then went on the explain that as he had come from parents with addictions the chances were that he would have an additive personality which could mean drugs or alcohol but we should try and channel this into a sport. Also because his mother was obese the chances were that he could be the same, we were also told that there was a high chance that he would have some of the issues in relation to alcohol foetal syndrome. We both felt again worried, deflated and extremely anxious.
But we then went home and had reality check, when you give birth to your own child you have no idea if its going to be healthy before its born and certainly have no idea if it has anything wrong development wise, so really we were given an information overload, so we took the view of what would be would be, and we would love him what ever the outcome as we’d already in or head starting including him as part of the family.
We were then given the date for matching panel 12th February our wedding anniversary.